Tuesday, April 6, 2010


Today my husband and I organized the garage. Most of the credit goes to him. I joined in toward the end of the day.. As we cleaned and prepped the shelves for painting, the kids ran around the house spilling cheerios all over the living room, with a movie blaring...I actually feel really guilty about that. Does anyone else let their kids roam the house unsupervised while doing housework? It's not often around here, but today it had to happen.

Ok, the point of the story, I was cold and wanted to go inside and make sure the kids weren't being too bad, and then as my husband and I have on our grubbies and have white primer all over our hands and clothes, he turns to me and says,"I love this. I love doing stuff like this with you. I would hate painting if I were in here alone, but I'm really enjoying it because we are doing this project together." Did that comment make the whole time climbing up and down the ladder, bumping my arm into wet paint over and over, worth it? oh yeah!

So, we had a good day, but it didn't start out that way...this morning I was letting insecurity get the best of me and thinking I was ugly and worthless in my husbands eyes, yet again. I was doing dishes and thought, "NO! I'm not going to ruin my day by thinking this way. I will not let what my husband thinks of me be more important than what God thinks of me." I remembered some of the promises of God and how much He loves me and finds me beautiful. I prayed to God and told Him my feelings on the matter and we worked past it. I was still having a hard time wanting to love my husband though. God and I were tight...but that guy over there, do I have to love him? :) God gave me a love for him by asking me to respect him today. To clear things up, my husband didn't say anything or make me feel bad in anyway. I'm just phenomenal at assuming things. lol

Moral of the story:

Marriage is so hard, especially if your continually assuming your spouse is uninterested in you...

Don't let your husbands view of you take preference over God's. (God is interested in YOU)

that is so important to living a secure life in Christ

and being able to love your spouse despite the way you think they feel toward you.

BTW, I totally love my husband and highly encourage others to love theirs as well. I'm brutally honest and don't always feel like loving my better half, :)


craftykat said...

I can relate to everything you're saying, Mariah... there are times we take on an assumption of how our husband view us, and just the world in general constantly bombards our perception of ourself- and GOD'S view of us. God's view of us trumps even our husband's- and we wives know how important it is to feel valued and loved by the person you committed to spend your whole life with. I think that's why it's so crucial to keep coming back to God, to keep Him at the front and center of our focus. Satan loves to make us question our value- to others, and to God. Thank you for sharing about your day and your struggles, Mariah, I appreciate your honesty about your ups and downs. :) (and I'm totally guilty of presuming things too... ;))

GlowinGirl said...

I have trouble not tying my security to my husband's moods. It's that whole two-as-one thing, I think, but I have to remember that there's a Third Party involved that holds it all together, and He is my true security. ;)

Hannah said...

hey at least he told you he enjoyed spending time with you while painting! That is good he enjoys your company. Just remember you're gorgeous and not just on the inside. You're really, very pretty. I know it would mean more coming from your spouse but maybe he just doesn't want to give you a big head! The best about you is your sparkling personality, so don't ever let anyone take away your zest for life!